It had been almost 3 weeks since i last ate with both my mom and dad together. I’ve been so busy for the past few weeks. And my mom said she want me to stay at home to eat tonight so that she can “discuss something with me”.
When i went down for dinner, i saw good food.
This means something is not right.
And bingo. Here you goes again, again, and again:
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Jason Low’s Girlfriend Act 2009
Part I: Criteria for your girlfriend
1. Must be of same height with you, or at least 5 feet 7.
2. Must come from poor family, but don’t so poor until no sense of fashion. Must be presentable.
3. Must be those kind of hardworking girl. Preferably the eldest daughter of the family, cause they are usually more hardworking.
4. Must be pretty, don’t pick those ugly ugly one. If not, next time when you go to business function, you’ll regret to bring your wife along.
5. Must be those kind of good girl who are hardworking, don’t find those kind like your sister.
6. Must find those who can speak Chinese, or else won’t be able to communicate with me (my mom). However, subject to section 7 below.
7. Don’t find Hong Kong or China girls. They are hard to please.
Part II: Guideline for treating your girlfriend:
1. You must start dating already.
2. You may invite her to live together with you in this house. Living together is good in terms of getting to know her personality better.
3. You must use condom everytime when having sex. Don’t get her pregnant while you’re still studying.
4. Don’t be too picky while choosing girlfriend, else you won’t get one by the age of 50.
5. Must bring back to let us (mom and dad) see and conduct quality assurance. Subject to section 6 below.
6. All girls which underwent Quality Assurance and were deemed to be unfit shall be disqualified and not allowed to be your girlfriend
7. Marriage gift to the girlfriend’s side shall vary as according to the satisfactory level of us (mom and dad)
8. All criteria and guideline listed above are merely of persuasive authority.
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OMG. I am so gonna veto this Act.
May God save the Queen so she can save ME!!!
P.S: My sister failed her UK degree test, so she’s gonna stay in UK one more year. Means I’ll be able to withhold my throne for one more year!!! WOOHOO!~ This means abusing driving her car for another one more year!~
14 cookie bites:
OMG.
YOUR PARENTS ARE SO SO SO FUNNY.
AND SOOOOOOOOO OPEN-MINDED!
HILARIOUS SHITTTTTT.
You're allowed to have SEX! :O
Amelia > They are more than happy if I do so and get them a couple of grandchildren =.=
WALAU!!
I'm against part 1 num 7! But then i agree with the 'ugly ugly one cannot' section.
sorry. part 1 num 6.
Oh my God...
Will they even buy the condom for you?
My mum is gonna to kill me
if I tell her that I have sex with other lol~
mal > both my parents aren't educated, hence they can't speak anything other than mandarin and cantonese. Hence they listed no. 6 XD
nick > i am allowed to buy my own condom =.= and i had bought it to my dad before as his birthday present. I think my parent won't kill me for having sex, instead they will be hyperly happy as long as i can get them grandchildrens =.=
LOL. those are some criteria! I can fulfill!! Got room in ur house? hahaha..!!
Angie > Got. Store room. Can?
No wonder the abalone..
zach > yes. she's hinting me >.< dammit
haha.. nice and funny guide! =D
kenwooi.com
may the cookie monster have lots of abalones~~~
hahahaha, wonder what's gonna happen in the future *imagines*
kenwooi > thx XD
robb > i'm gonna be SO DEAD by then. I dun wan abalone T.T
I can't wait to c who is your girlfriend...
BIG BIG BOY, no no no, MAN already..
Remember to let know who, OK!!!
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